My Wish List


 This week I celebrated my 27th wedding anniversary with my amazing husband. He is always great at taking me on trips or buying me gifts that are just perfect for me. However, this year is so different. 2022 has sucked. I am on chemo and dealing with depression and anxiety. So when he asked what I wanted for my anniversary gift all I could say was "nothing you can give me".

Here's my top 10 wish list (in no particular order):

1. To be able to eat at a restaurant.

2. To have a nice glass of wine and feel normal.

3. To plan a vacation this summer.

4. To sit in the sun and no be burned after 5 minutes.

5. To be able to go to church.

6. To go shopping (grocery, clothes, whatever).

7. To be able to sleep normally and not need so many naps.

8. To have hair. 

9. To feel pretty instead of like Gollum the Hobbit. 

10. To exercise, hike, swim, walk the beach... move without pain and exhaustion. 

I have realized that I don't need more things. I am ready to purge and get rid of things. But I want my life back. In fact I want a better life. I want joy again. I want health again. I want to be active. Nothing someone can give me. I have to continue to wait for this stupid cancer and all the disgusting chemo poisons to leave my body. That can take 6-12 more months. 

So wait I will do. It's all I can do. 

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